“Once, with WCW’s entire roster on a charter plane experiencing EXTREME turbulence - a few girls were CRYING, a few guys were SHAKING - Randy broke the tension by saying, ‘Just think of the rating the memorial show’s gonna draw, boys - OOOH, YEAH!’”—
Former WCW commentator Mark Madden, on Randy Savage’s sardonic sense of humor :)
Thursday Raw Thursday comes to you in our trademark WOO! vs. BOO! format. Everything “WOO!” was awesome, while everything “BOO!” was killed by that murderous, scary, serial killing wrestler guy Kane John Cena.
ANGRY WRESTLERS SPEAKING ANGRILY TO EACH OTHER
It’s weird that I have to…
My second Thursday Raw Thursday for Fair To Flair, available every (wait for it) Thursday.
And I don’t want to do this, because I really like this show most years, but I predict a dull Rumble.
TH: I couldn’t disagree any more with that sentiment. They’ve nailed the last two Rumbles big time, and even in years when there is no overarching story or when the promotion has been on a downturn, the Rumble match has long been the constant. I don’t know, it’s something about the battle royale, the element of surprise, the unknown entrants and the fact that this year, Rock and Cena are making it so that one of the status quo (Cena, Triple H, Taker or Orton) does not have to win.
Even if we take out the stories going into the Rumble, who really expected to see CM Punk hold court in 2010 like he did, or Beth Phoenix make her appearance as a surprise entrant? Was there anything in 2011 that suggested Morrison was going to do his parkour to stave off elimination? Whomever they have doing the Rumble now is doing a great job laying the match out. There could be absolutely no storylines and a telegraphed-from-June winner going in, and it would still be must watch.
Hey, there’s no doubt there’ll be a few moments that make the match fun. There always are. And I’ll admit that 2011 was a blast, even if winning it didn’t really amount to much for Del Rio. But both Morrisson and Punk made it really fun, and neither of them will be in it this year. I’m sure someone else will step up, but I’m not at all sure who it will be. It’s that uncertainty (and the lack of any real build so far) that’s giving me the fear.
But TH, why did you have to go and mention the Undertaker? Dammit, that’s what’s going to happen now.
I sincerely apologize for any Undertaker fear mongering.
That being said, yes, Punk, Ziggler and presumably Bryan won’t be in the Rumble this year. Cena being in the Rumble might set up some interesting double duty stories for WM, but I doubt they’ve thought about that at all. Orton and del Rio right now are touch and go it seems. So who does that leave? There’s Mark Henry. The Funkasaurus. Sheamus. Jack Swagger. A possible returning Christian. Evan Bourne. Zack Ryder. Those are all tantalizing options to do stuff. Also, there’s the prospect of a Dean Ambrose or a Seth Rollins or an Antonio Cesaro making a surprise debut. Maybe even there’ll be a shocking comeback, although the only one I can think of right now is Rob Van Dam, and fuck me if I ever get excited to see that stiff back in a WWE ring.
There’s also the minute possibility that they honor Gregory Iron’s petition and let him in the Rumble, which would be an amazing gesture (which is why I feel like they’re not going to do it… they’re not known for amazing gestures towards people they don’t already employ or who are just fans). I think this year’s Rumble is special for the unknown factor.
I agree with KSP that I doubt the Rumble will have many lasting repercussions, storyline wise. It’s been vastly overshadowed by MITB.
However, it has always been fun. The idea is so simple and classic, and usually accounts for a few great moments every year, regardless if the impact is lasting. There are always a few surprises, and I personally am very excited for the Rumble.
I think the Royal Rumble is one of those things I’ll be forever conditioned to be excited for, no matter what the build is. The build for the 2010 Rumble, if I remember correctly, didn’t really start until a week or two prior to the show, and some people were predicting a DX co-win. That is not exciting. But I sure as shit ordered it.
I also ordered and watched Capitol Punishment by myself so maybe I should decondition myself (I can’t quit you, WWE).
A quick intro - I’ve come to realize that my reviews, if one even gets done, get done late. So, I’ve decided to brand my own tardiness! Every Thursday you can find my review of Raw here, and over on my blog, PIZZABODYSLAM. If you haven’t seen the Thursday Raw Thursday, please watch this…
My re-debut as The Funkasaurus THURSDAY. RAW. THURSDAY.
This Raw review comes to you in our trademark WOO! vs. BOO! format. Everything “WOO!” was awesome, while everything “BOO!” was hit in the knee with a lead pipe, carted out of the arena, and continuously carted through big, swinging double-doors that say “TNA”. I also picture the EMTs that carted…